Mum, I really don't know where to start.
I wake to what feels like a dream, after wishing you were at peace during the most difficult time of our life's, to now longing to return to even eleven days ago, where your heart still beat and the warmth of your heart was felt inside mine. As I left you there I forever left a piece of mine.
I catch myself for a moment forgetting you are gone, wanting one of our endless conversations to just chat. So I open my phone and listened to one of your voice notes and feel close to you once more.
Until the end your sole focus was your children and grandchildren, and ours, of course you.
Your strength, bravery and courage was immeasurable.
I remind myself daily of your courage to see me through these darkest of days.
I promise the children will never forget their Nanny G, as I know that played heavily on your mind. Your love, guidance, strength, humour and love for a bowl of chocolate will live on in them.
When my turn comes, I will not fear it, as I know I will also go out of the arms of the ones we love, into the arms of the ones we loved.
I will love and miss you forever xxx
Clare Louise Bell
12/11/2024